Happiness Starts with a Spark: How to Stop Feeding the Sadness and Anger



Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.
~ Albus Dumbledore

No matter how bright or how small, that light is what will guide you home. That light is always within us waiting for the switch to get turned on, or the pile of wood to ignite.  It takes that one thought to help you move forward and out of the darkness of the cave.  That fire will warm you right up and help you cook a delicious meal.  If you can light one candle, you can light all the un-lit candles!!

In that moment of sadness, disappointment, anger, turmoil it can be so tough.  I feel you.  Sometimes we can be so stubborn to turn away from that light and only allow a flicker.  Just remember this:  Our brains produce incredible chemicals like neurotransmitters, steroids, and peptides.  Now before you click X on the window, stay with me, I’m not getting all scientific on you.  This next part will blow your mind!

I’m going to explain this as simple and concise as I can to the best of my ability so bear with me:  Peptides are produced in the hypothalamus and are in charge of our thinking and feeling.  Peptides ==> pituitary gland ==> bloodstream.  What happens is, with the trillions of cells in our bloodstream, peptides dock onto the cells and translate all moods, behaviours, and actions.  Our boy is constantly going through cell divisions and replacing the dead cells approximately every 30 minutes.  Every time a cell divides, our emotions, behaviours, and thoughts lock onto each of these cells.


If you feel depressed for an hour, you’ve produced approximately eighteen billion new cells that have more receptors calling out for depressed-type peptides and fewer calling out for feel-good peptides… It also creates the need for more gloomy thoughts, and you become addicted to gloominess.
~ Chris Prentiss
Zen and the Art of Mindfulness

Just as much as someone can become addicted to alcohol, drugs, sugar – Someone can become addicted to emotions because of the thoughts, actions, and emotions. This is why many mystics, gurus, monks, healers who I have read extensively of say, “Feel beauty from the inside out”.  And it’s true.  It all starts with the mind both conscious mind and subconscious mind to be reprogrammed to where it is able to be more positive, more empowered, more open-minded to change, transformation, and growth.  (Read 5 Mindful Steps to Connect With Your Authentic Self for more insight on this topic).

We are the masters of our minds, not the other way around.

Years ago, I used to be in the headspace where my body was predominantly feeding off of depression and anger.  It was a very painful place to be when I was there and I was the only one who could take control of the wheel, press on the brakes, and pull the vehicle over so-to-speak.  No matter what anyone else told me, what went on in my mind was so intense that “it’s going to be okay” just wasn’t what would pull me out of that space.  Not until years later did I discover meditation and mindfulness practices.  I believe it all saved my life.  When you become addicted to strong, intoxifying emotions like anger and sadness then bouncing to the highs and back to the lows, it is a very vulnerable place to be – easily becoming addicted to other things.  Without going into deep detail, I was able to rise above it all by implementing rituals for myself throughout the day to stay aligned, in-tune with myself, and deeply listening to my heart.  It took years to finally go weeks and months without rebounding to need those negative emotions.  When I do feel them rise in me, I deeply contemplate and meditate on those emotions and thoughts without locking them up and throwing away the key.  I learned to face them and ask myself, “Why do you feel these emotions?  Why are you having these thoughts?  How can you light that pile of wood so you can nurture yourself back to a harmonious state?”

Ayoucanhealyourlife.jpegfter deeply connecting with myself, I was able to remove blockages and limitations that I had set on myself to be able to move forward and release the stubbornness.  A couple years later, when I was at Southwest Institute for Healing Arts doing my Mind-Body Wellness Practitioner program, I was introduced to an eye-opening resource, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay.  I learned a lot about the pain body and its correlation with emotional, mental, spiritual trauma being withheld.  After peeling so much of the muck, underneath were layers and layers still awaiting their turn to be peeled away.  So I thoroughly went through the book and absorbed, implemented, and experimented.  If you are feeling pain in your body, reoccurring illnesses, etc, I highly suggest this book as alternative healing.

So since we’re on the topic of pain body and emotions, I thought I’d share this image related to but not from the book:


With the new thoughts being reprogrammed into the conscious mind and subconscious mind, the cells are able to align to that frequency of positivity and thus, the body attunes to that as well.  Wholeness.  We’ve got to treat our precious human bodies with respect, love, and nurturing like a mother does with her child– And it all starts with that one spark of light, igniting the pile of wood to become a beautiful, warm, and nurturing fire.  That fire in a wood burning stove can warm up the entire house!  So, dive in deep and light that match because you know you have a lot of love you want to share.  Take care of yourself first though.


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